Joni Eareckson Tada, a paraplegic since the age of 18, tells about a time when her husband, Ken, sat down on their bed and said, “I feel trapped,” voicing the fatigue and frustration bred by the extreme and endless care required for his wife. Joni unloaded on him—“What were you thinking when you married me? What did you expect? How do you think I feel?” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she wished she could call them back. “Oh, Ken, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what got into me? That isn’t me.” The Holy Spirit seemed to whisper to her, “Oh, yes, Joni. That is exactly you.”
I had a similar experience yesterday. Joyce’s father broke his hip and was taken to an Austin hospital for surgery. (Everything went fine and he is doing well). I went with Joyce, because I know she is uncomfortable driving in big cities. We arrived about 11:30 a.m. and went to his room. We spent several hours talking to support staff, making decisions about his future. I began to get restless, wondering whether or not we are going to beat rush hour traffic. Joyce did something completely harmless and not affecting me whatsoever, but I made an unkind remark. In a very sweet voice and a smile on her face (thunder rumbling in the background) she said, “I don’t like it when you do that.” I immediately felt angry, mostly at myself, saying to myself, “Why did I say that? We have been having a wonderful time together. I love her more than I ever have. Well I have been up since 5 a.m., driven over two hours to Austin, spent several hours in a hospital room and my medication is wearing off.” Then another line of thinking entered the conversation. “No, I am acting like the sinner I am, apart from God’s grace.’
Oh, how we love to justify our sin! Lord, protect me and everyone else from me.
Check out this link for more about wisdom in relationships.